Castro-dictator, great leader?

castroFidel Castro died yesterday.  Now, the eulogies and statements and retrospectives begin. “man of the people”, “Controversial leader”…”he brought healthcare and put Cuba on the map”.  He is why the largest Cuban population is in Miami!

Castro was a Communist DICTATOR!   He imprisoned or worst, dissidents-people that didn’t agree with him!  I have many Cuban/Cuban American friends and it disturbs me that his regime was just “controversial.”

Yes, when you think about it, he was a great man.

At what price?  On some news show, they lauded the fact that you can go to Havana-Castro didn’t do that…Obama did.

I’m not  espousing political agendas..  I just don’t think the end always justifies the means…

 

Thanksgiving songs, yes there are some!

thanksgivingI could not think of a single song for Thanksgiving!  Closest was Roll around the house tonight-sung to Rock Around the House!  I’ll spare you the rest!  So, I went to a wise source…Okay, I googled it!  Lo and behold, it had a list!

The first one, I laughed at “Food Glorious Food?” from Oliver!.  How ap propos!  Okay, not sure…appropriate!

Followed by the greed song in Willy Wonka -the one with Gene Wilder, of course!where the little girl, Violet, turns into a blueberry!  My inclusion!

“Count Your Blessings”-the old Bing Crosby standard.

The hymn which truly epitomizes Thanksgiving, “We Gather Together.”

In a different vein, Adam Sandler’s hilarious, “Thanksgiving Song”

And for our dose of schmaltz, but, I love it, too!  “My Favorite Things” from The Sound of Music

 

And I tell all my clients that this time, as well as all the time, keep a Gratitude Journal.  Write down 3 things you’re grateful for each day!  It could be birds singing or crisp apples, family or a roof over our heads.  It can be the simplest thing.  Also, write down all the people you’re thankful for having in your life!  Say thank you to each & why!  Thanks to all my readers who let me share my thoughts and send your comments!

 

Happy Thanksgiving!

NLP-What is it, anyway? Part Three

NLP is a hybrid of science-how the brain works and psychology, the mind…

brain-graphicPattern interrupt is an NLP staple.  It is used as a way of getting the client out of the story around the problem and disassociate from the problem.  This emphasizes that what happened in the past isn’t the focus.  The focus how is this a problem for you now?  Asking clarifying questions to be very clear on the problem may elicit a story.  People can be extremely attached to their story and it may be hard to pry them loose!

Being so attached to your story can result in having blinders on and dismissing anything that’s a possible solution to the problem the client has identified.

A question that comes up immediately is why are they holding on to the story that they can’t be helped?  What’s the payoff to not solving the problem?  For example-the problem is they need to be right all the time and it’s causing a rift in their primary relationship?  What’s the payoff?  Get to be right, and get to have the other person be wrong.  Get rewarded for being right, report cards, awards, praise…Could be this makes the client feel important and is getting attention…This behavior is not working at home.

Whenever you are faced with a problem, you need to think what’s the payoff to this strategy (the plan or recipe) for dealing with the problem.  “well that didn’t work-we wouldn’t want to do that again, would you?”

 

NLP-what is it anyway? Part Two

miscommunicationNLP is a way to look at communication and my question is always-“how can I use this tool in my coaching?  There is no doubt in my mind that being aware of how we take in information will help me identity which method of giving information is being used.  There is the Visual learner-pictures, graphs,visual representations are dominant.  Word choice gives clues.  ” How does that look to you?”  “It appears that…””Then, there’s Auditory-taking information in through sound ,look at word choice,too… I’m Visual with Kinesthetic as well…We’ll discuss this shortly.  The languageing around your internal representation of reality-  “I see your point” vs.  “Sounds familiar”.  “I hear you.” “That sounds reasonable.”…” That rings a bell…””…music to my ears!”

Kinesthetic is all about feelings.  How does it feel?  I need to put my finger on it.  I’ll be in touch…Auditory-Digital is what you say to yourself about any given situation.  “What do you think ?”is a great question and truly represents what’s happening.

As a former teacher and counselor turned coach, the importance of this concept cannot be over emphasized.  People are rarely one modality but rather, a combination of 2 or more.  I try to address all the different ways of taking in information in my coaching. Part Three  we will be talking about patterns.

NLP- what is it, anyway Part one

For cover letter blogWhen I want to know about something, I take further learning in it.  I immerse myself.  I’ve come off an concentrated 4 days in beautiful La Costa Resort, a playground for the rich!  5k/night suite which you can get a formal dining room we gathered about daily to dive deeper into NLP, It’s tools and what techniques to comfortably apply this.

We went over exercises and I discovered, I can do this.  Neuro-Linguistic Programming  (NLP), is a combination of science and psychology.  It was a way of studying the impact of th therapeutic process.  In the 60s and 70s, 3 therapists were studied.   Milton Erickson,,known for Hypnotherapy, Fritz Perls -Gestalt Psychology and Virginia Satir, Family Therapy.  Richard Bandler and John Grinder studied how to make concise and effective behavioral changes.

We take in information-2 Million bits of information-and through the senses-seeing,smelling, tasting, hearing…We get the information then, delete, distort or generalize that information.  All  of this is on an unconscious level.

Therapy asks the question-“what’s wrong…  why?”   NLP asks, “what’s right?” so we can repeat it. More in Part Two.

Writers’ Block-How to beat it!

confedd womanAs an author, there is nothing to dampen your writing spirit by just not coming up with a single sentence!  When Writers” Block rears it’s ugly head…This is what works for me…

Change your location.  Get up move around, jog i place, dance to music, in training, it’s a State Change.  Isn’t that what you’re doing?

Last resort is I take a walk outside, but I try to stay nearby if I’m suddenly inspired!

webI write just about everything by the computer.  I don’t write. I input. In a 60 minutes segment, it’s when Andy Rooney closed the show…He said that he feels writers lose something by not writing in longhand or having to retype ( as using a typewriter) the novel or really, any book, over and over embellishing an enhancing the story.  It caused a better draft and a better book.  Huh.

Answer a friend on Facebook, but if you’re the type to spend hours on social media…Not a great plan.

Free write.writing-book

“I can’t believe I can’t think of what to write. this is a silly way..” .Sometimes, just the mere act of inputting sparks something and words start to flow!

Outline what you want o say or draw your ideas.  Even if it’s stick figures…draw!  Being creative in another medium may get those creative juices flowing.

Or I truly get up and leave setting an alarm for 45 minutes.  So, I’ll know to resume my writing!

It’s Election Day! An end is in sight!

Trump pictureearth photohillarymiscommunicationToday has finally arrived!  I don’t know about but I’m sick and tired of hearing both candidates’ sniping.  Look, I won’t tell you how to vote.

Heck, you’re not even to talk about politics among friends or family.  I hope folks are decided.  It’s a bit late in the game to be on the fence!

So, go exercise your right to vote.  Many people-both Presidents, suffragettes and ones no one’s heard of…

Wear that I voted sticker proudly.

The” real skinny” about writing a book!

midlife_2There’s my book (coming out for the Holidays) “Turning Midlife into the RIGHT Life!” Gotta get that in whenever I can…and the perfect segue… There are basically 3 Top Marketing reasons given for having a book for sale…

Inspire-You have a message you want to share.  You really , truly want to help others by sharing that message.  What is the best way to do that?

Desire-You want to get that message out…Have everybody buy your book!  This is your path to being a NY Times Bestseller and on Amazon-choose your categories well!

Acquire- Even the word has a negative connotation!  But, in truth, it’s where authors end up Speaking and offering more-coaching programs or an audio of the book or some other, usually,a flagship product.  The book lends credibility. You are an expert on your topic!

You can also use your book as a business card.  Give to event planners.  When you want to do radio/TV or even for print media, contact ad begin your “pitch” it first with…I am the author of….Send the book to media you know, like and trust.  Don’t send your book to everyone, you’ll go broke!

I donate a book for a raffles at a fundraiser and try to attend the event.  Doorprizes are a great way to spread the word about your book.

But, regardless of why you’re writing a book…Start by writing! 🙂

5 Reasons to write a book!

chapter-one

I went to Author 101 and we discussed the ideas of writing a book.  I know why I write-to bring a message of loving your Life and your work/business( in THAT order!)  But I digress-here are the top Five Reasons to Write a Book:

Bonus-it’s really cool to see your name as the author!

1.You have something to say.  You want educate, entertain, inspire and motivate your audience.writing-book

2. You want to be financially free.  Books are rare to be that lucrative.  We hear stories of Grisham or Deepak Chopra whose books put them on the map and sold millions of copies!

It takes a great deal of time and hours of writing so your topic should make your heart sing not just dream about cha-ching!

3..  Gives you credibility.  You can charge for speaking.  You can send event planners and get hired to speak on stage!

4. The book is part of your sales funnel-you always need lower price point items to lead customer/consumer to getting more from you.  You might, like I do, a group coaching program, then, a home study course maybe or one on one coaching.  You also want to think of different ways to offer your book-audio, video teaching or with a companion workbook or as a package.

5. Get on radio or TV.  A great side effect of getting media…you’ll sell more books!  Whether you self-publish or go to a big NYC publisher or somewhere in between.  You are marketing your book.  It is no one’s responsibility but yours.

My book, “Turning Midlife into the RIGHT Life!”  guiding you to smooth transition… will be available for the holidays.  To pre-order, email me at marcia@midlifetransitioncoaching.commidlife_2

 

Author 101, I highly recommend it!

booksFour days ago, I was in LA-I was awarded an EIPPY for a book I contributed to hitting Bestseller, “The Big Idea Book”!  You can get them through me, marcia@midlifetransitioncoaching.com  Just drop me a line- $20 and shipping is included!

What I really am dying to tell you about is Author 101.  It was for three days-full ones, as in bring snacks & plenty of water…Three whole days on Radio/TV guest spots-how to get them & what to say.  The importance of doing video was stressed and had a YouTube success story-he sold 50,000 books!

There were seasoned authors and just writers who want to be authors and everything in between!  We were able to listen to panels of literary agents and in a speed dating fashion, you got to sped pitch your book ideas or actual manuscript!

The pros & cons of traditional publishing, using create space or some other to self-publish or a hybrid POD-Publish on demand, publisher…Some extremely lucky & talented authors walk out with book deals, most don’t.  You make excellent contacts/connections. I’m friending folks I met and have their cards to further the connection.  Rick Frishman created this event and has 35+ years in Publishing.

I think I found my publisher, Perfect Publishing-back in Maryland where I am!  Ken Rochon, the Founder of Perfect Publishing, was one of the first people I saw…It took us to be in LA to reconnect!  How funny is that? 🙂

Authors from ten years to ninety were there. I came away inspired.  Ken Source of Lead Gen talked about online marketing…He had a Campaign Organizer for us to do at home and give to him.  He’ll critique your online presence. He so inspired me-I was up at 6am filling out the Organizer!

He also showed me how to do Facebook Live and I committed to doing at least one video each day til April 6, 2017,  Author 101 is at Hyatt Regency in LA near LAX!  The rooms are gorgeous and in the process of refurbishing the hotel!

I’ll see ya there! April 6-8, 2017.  LeadGen event is day before, then go to Author 101 for FREE!